The Scone of Stone

Again, I almost missed International Scone Week, and if not for lovely Carol of Retired? No one told me! I would not have known. Thank you, Carol, for keeping me informed!

For reasons you already know, Beautiful People, this is yet another repeat.

The Scone of Stone was stolen! It was stolen from the most unexpected and the best guarded place, The Dwarf Bread Museum. Of course, dwarf breads were substantially different from our breads; that is, different in substance. In fact, they included gravel as one of the main ingredients. According to the late Sir Terry Pratchett, whose whimsical imagination gave birth to Discworld and everything in it, “they were probably as edible now as they were on the day they were baked. “Forged” was a better term. Dwarf bread was made as a meal of last resort and also as a weapon and a currency” (The Fifth Elephant).


The new Low King of dwarfs was about to be crowned, but the Scone of Stone, a crucial element of coronation procedure, went missing. To explain the vital role of it, here is a dialogue between the valiant Commander of Watch Vimes, whose responsibility it is to find it, and a distinguished vampire-on-the-wagon Lady Margolotta who speaks with a heavy Transylvanian accent:

We’ll have to wait until they bake another one?” said Vimes.

“No. There will be no more Low Kings,” said Lady Margolotta. “Legitimacy, you see. The Scone represents continuity all the vay to B’hrian Bloodaxe. They say he sat on it vhile it vas still soft and left his impression, as it vere.”

“You mean kingship has passed from bu—backside to backside?”

“Humans believe in crowns, don’t they?”

“Yes, but at least they’re at the other end!”

“Thrones, then.” Lady Margolotta sighed. “People set such store by strange things. Crowns. Relics. Garlic…

Now that you had your little chuckle, the most incredible part of this fantasy is that it is based on reality: a unique heist, or, as it was called, “a heist 600 years in the making.”

This film is based on real events. Stone of Destiny, AKA Stone of Scone, over which Scottish Kings were traditionally crowned at Scone in Perthshire, was captured by King Edward I of England in 1296 to be installed under the British throne at Westminster Abbey in London. Subsequent British monarchs, including the current Queen Elizabeth II, have been crowned on it.  However, in 1950, four Scottish students managed to steal it from Westminster Abbey and return it to Scotland. One of them, Ian Hamilton, tells this amazing story.

The students were never prosecuted, but “the Stone of Scone was returned to London, where it remained until 1996, when it was moved to Edinburgh Castle “on loan” with the understanding that it would be brought back to Westminster Abbey for the next Coronation” (Wikipedia).

With all due respect to dear friends across the pond, I have tasted scones several times and every time was reminded of gravel as an essential ingredient. Not my thing, I thought, until a wonderful blogger and custodian of two gorgeous kitty boys weggieboy  AKA Doug Thomas (who has sadly lost one of the adorable kitty brothers) mentioned that one of my posts had prompted him to make scones, and Boy! Were they yummy! Obviously, I saw it as a challenge: can I make scones that will not belong in the Dwarf Bread Museum?

Scones 1.jpg

Ihave studied a bunch of various recipes, and finally came up with this. I whisked spelt flour with brown sugar, baking powder and a pinch of salt. For our purposes, I consider spelt gluten free, but please consult your physician. I am sure gluten free flour of your choice could be used instead. Meanwhile, I had some Smart Balance in the freezer, getting ready.

Scones 3.jpg

Smart Balance, or any other non-dairy butter substitute, is softer than butter, so it should be frozen solid in order to be diced. You have to dice it very quickly as it softens literally under your fingers. Add it to the flour mixture but do not overwork it.

Scones 4.jpg

I know that classic scones have currants in them, but I had these huge juicy blueberries, so I mixed them in.  Better than gravel!

Scones 2.jpg

Finally, whisk some aquafaba (or an egg, if you want), together with non-dairy prostokvasha, or clabbered milk (for recipe, please click here), or any store-bought non-dairy kefir of yogurt. Add some vanilla extract and gradually incorporate it into the flour mixture. Turn it onto floured work surface and gently kneed.

Scones 5.jpg

The dough will be crumbly, but don’t worry, just don’t overdo it. Flatten it into thick rounds and cut into wedges.

Scones 6.jpg

Why scones must be this shape, I have no idea, unless it’s another one of those dwarf traditions that “people set store by.” Arrange your wedges on a lightly misted with oil baking sheet, spray them with oil (or use egg wash), and sprinkle with a mix of cocoa powder and xylitol or powdered sugar. Send it to the oven for a while and read some Terry Pratchett. Have a good laugh.

Scones 7

The more chocolate, the better! A splash of chocolate syrup never hurt anybody. As good as my scones look, they will not be accepted into the Dwarf Bread Museum for two reasons: first of all, they came out moist and delicious, and secondly, they disappeared faster that you can say CORONATION.


  • 2 cups spelt flour
  • 3 tablespoons light brown sugar
  • 2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 3/4 teaspoon salt
  • ½ cup frozen Smart Balance, diced
  • 1 cup blueberries
  • 1/2 cup non-dairy prostokvasha (clabbered milk), kefir, or yogurt
  • 3/4 cup aquafaba or 1 large egg
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • Unsweetened cocoa powder mixed with xylitol or powdered sugar for dusting


  • Preheat oven to 400 F. Lightly mist baking sheet with oil.
  • Mix flour, brown sugar, baking powder, and salt. Add diced Smart Balance, mix lightly. Add blueberries.
  • Whisk together prostokvasha, aquafaba, and vanilla extract. Gently incorporate into flour mixture, turn out dough onto floured work surface, lightly knead.
  • Form thick rounds (about 1 inch or 2.5 cm), cut into wedges. Transfer to baking sheet. Mist with oil or paint with egg wash, sprinkle with mix of cocoa powder and powdered sugar or xylitol.
  • Bake for 20 – 25 minutes or until golden brown.  Cool on rack.


37 Comments Add yours

  1. Julia says:

    I love the Discworld books! I love the picture of the dwarf bread, thanks for sharing!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for stopping by and commenting, dear Julia. We have a full collection of Discworld – love them!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Julia says:

        I have so many of his books. I even have a signed Discworld book by Sir Terry. He was a brilliant, funny writer.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Yes he was, and I envy you the signed one. We do have his other books as well, including Good Omens he co-authored with Neil Gaiman.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Julia says:

        I have also Good Omens. I enjoy Neil Gaiman’s books as well.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Oh yes, American Gods?

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Julia says:

        Yes! And the Sandman. Do you like Douglas Adams?

        Liked by 1 person

      6. Of course! I read it first in Russian, and a very decent translation.
        And Gaiman’s Anansi Boys?

        Liked by 1 person

      7. Julia says:

        Yes, I enjoyed Anansi Boys. Have you read the Ocean at the End of the Lane by Gaian?

        Liked by 1 person

      8. Nope, thank you for recommending. Will do.

        Liked by 1 person

      9. Julia says:

        You are welcome.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. lghiggins says:

    What funny stories. I have to say that all the scones I have had have been delicious, but I think that making them fit your dietary requirements would be a challenge that I’m sure you are up to.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So far, so good, as per my son and my husband. Thank you so much, dear Linda.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. This is, hands down, the best food blog ever. History, fantasy, recipe 😋

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I thank you humbly, David. But I am from Odessa – I am just having fun!


  4. Thank you for repeating this one. I don’t think I’ve seen it before.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I thank you, Derrick, for keeping tabs on my posts. I am quite pleased.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Perfect! I think it is time to put on the kettle!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You go right ahead and enjoy, dear Dorothy!

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I am with you. Eating gravel is definitely NOT my thing either. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Lulu: “Hmm, scones have gravel as an ingredient, you say? Maybe our Dada would like them, then. He eats Grape-Nuts for breakfast sometimes, and that doesn’t have gravel as an ingredient—that IS gravel!”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yuck! Have you tasted them, Lulu girl?
      Mama eats only fresh fruit for breakfast and drinks coffee. We don’t get any.
      The Cat Gang


  8. This story makes me chuckle every time i read it. My prayer is that you are recovering quickly and well.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amen! Thank you so much, dear Mimi.


    1. Thank you so much for reblogging, dear friend.


  9. Don’t worry, Dolly! I never before had heard about the International Scone Week! Lol Really, you are teaching me always very interesting new things. Thanks so much, and have a good week! xx Michael

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Don’t worry, Michael! I tend to forget about those International days, weeks, and months. It’s Carol who keeps me in line.
      You too, have a wonderful week.


  10. CarolCooks2 says:

    Thank you for the mention, dear Dolly and you are welcome for the reminder…Your scones sound most delicious..I hope you are healing well from your unfortunate accident 🙂 x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, dear Carol. The healing process is somewhat lengthy, but it is moving in the right direction.


  11. Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for reblogging, dear friend.


  12. Lakshmi Bhat says:

    Fascinating. Thank you for the recipe 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. My pleasure, dear friend, and I thank you for a lovely comment.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Doug Thomas says:

    Glad you gave scones a Dolly-twist and tried them again! They are similar to our biscuit, if a little more refined, I suppose. My Scottish grandmother surely would have had the clotted cream or jam with hers. I know, without a doubt, she’d brew herself a nice pot of tea to enjoy with her scones.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Iam sure your grandmother made the best scones, as mine made the best gefilte fish. It’s cultural.


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